Do you define yourself by your flaws?

Shona Marshall

I normally spend Christmas in places like Tanzania, Zambia or Nepal, volunteering with Shona: The Survival Kit for Girls (For clarity, the charity isn’t named after me, but the sister of the founder.). We visit schools, orphanages and community groups to spread a message of personal validation, and give young girls the tools they need to overcome challenging circumstances. It’s intense, often distressing, but always life affirming work.

One thing I’ve learned with Shona is that some messages are universal. They are just as relevant to a young girl in an orphanage, as they are to a delegate on an ABSTRACT course such as ACCELERATE.

You aren’t defined by your flaws          

Have you ever made the wrong decision? Not been your best when it mattered? Overstretched yourself and failed?

Firstly, welcome to the club. There are a lot of members. You, me, and everyone else on earth.

And secondly, congratulations. Accepting that you have flaws, and are capable of mistakes, means you have the tools to be a strong leader.
  • Embracing your mistakes makes you authentic.
  • Acknowledging them allows you to adapt.
  • Accepting they are a part of you enables you to improve.
Whether you live in an orphanage in India, or are an executive in a FTSE 100 company, the message is the same: If you can be yourself, that is enough. Nobody is perfect.

In fact, if you can’t be yourself, which is what you’re doing if you don’t acknowledge your flaws, then you will never feel good enough.

You – and your team – are defined by how you accept your flaws

As a leader, owning up to your mistakes when they happen, and embracing your flaws, is the first step towards being authentic, transparent and open.

If you can lead by example, and show people that failure is an acceptable outcome, you will nurture a positive atmosphere that encourages personal growth, and pulls up those around you.

You will give your direct reports the courage and inspiration to take chances, and push to perform at their very best levels.

Not being able to accept your flaws will hold you back, build distance from others when you need trust and collaboration, and prevent you from gathering the skills you need.

In fact, not being able to accept you have flaws is probably the biggest flaw you can have.

Shona Marshall has been an Associate Consultant for ABSTRACT since 2018. She is also a Committee member for Mid Scotland CIPD Branch and Head of International Impact for The Shona Project, a social enterprise which focuses on girl empowerment and self-belief.

ABSTRACT’s vision is to make the corporate world a better and fairer place and our purpose is changing people’s lives. We do this through programmes that focus on Inclusive Leadership, career management for underrepresented groups and encouraging our clients to build modern businesses, fit for today’s social objectives. 
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